I was a very obese kid growing up, but extremely intelligent. I didn't get a long with my peers very well and was often considered to be an outcast. Most of high school, I didn't have a very active social life. My mother was an OCD neat freak and made me afraid to go out in the world. Her fears became my fears and I became afraid of the world. My grandmother lived with us and she was emotionally abusive. My mother and step-father were in constant yelling matches with us and each other.

There I was - I had everything in the world that I ever wanted. A loving partner, a happy home life, doing the things that I love with my partner. I couldn't wait to get home from work every day. She was my best friend. But one day, I was overcome by sadness and sorrow. All I wanted to do was be alone.

I don't really know where to begin, but I hope that getting this out makes me feel even a little bit better...